His smile alongside my fears

Looked at a candid picture of my son and me today. He looks terrified in the pic. It made me laugh out loud, over and over! It struck me as so funny because I found the pic within a whole reel of others where he looks perfectly happy. And there I am, by his side, in all of them, smiling, even in the one in which he looks absolutely terrified!

I wondered: Is this how Jesus is with me? No matter what I am going through… calmly smiling? When I’m terrified– like my son is in the picture– is Jesus giving that look of fright, too? Or is He smiling, peacefully smiling like I am smiling in the picture– because He knows the “happy ending” of the story?

I’d like to think Jesus is somehow mysteriously doing the former, empathizing with me, as well as the latter: HOPING for me akd KNOWING i will get through it!

Yoi see, I like crosses because they are great reminders of who Christ is. But I LOVE crucifixes because, to me, they are great reminders of what Christ did for me. Jesus died for me, He suffered for me, because He knew that in my suffering, I would look to Him and ask: *Do You understand, my LORD and my God? Do You know what it is like?”

He answers, “Yes, my child. I do know. Because I did this for you. To give you life, LIFE abundantly.”

Yer aside from the suffering image of Our Savior, I do love that thought of Him smiling as I look to Him whilst I am gripped by my deepest fears. And while I tremble, while I can barely get out a word, He’s not just smiling; He’s also holding me; He’s squeezing my hand; He’s whispering, “Here I am… I am with you… lean into me… feel me simply hold you… let me carry you.”

“There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and he who fears is not perfected in love.” 1 John 4:18 

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